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“How I Met My Granddaddy”
By Pamela Sallee Griffin
I created my first “family tree” while in grade school. I don’t know the year, but I can tell by my handwriting that I was young. A teacher had given us the assignment. With the help of my parents, I was able to complete my tree up to my four grandparents—Paternal: Elbert Sallee, II, Willie Caudle, and Maternal: Christle Fillmore and Evans McWilliams. At least that’s what I thought. And that was that!
I did not become interested in genealogy again until much later in life—maybe back in the 1980s. I had spent a good number of years studying ancient African history, with the goal of raising my four children to be more aware and appreciative of their African heritage than I had been raised with. I began to build my family tree once more. This time when I asked my mother about her mom and dad and their families, she “mentioned” that there was a rumor that a man named Clarence L. Dudley might be her biological father, rather than Evans M. McWilliams, Sr., her mother’s husband of many years. I guess she thought I was an adult now and could handle the information. I don’t know. Dang! Now, this just put a real damper on my genealogical pursuits. I was thinking, “Why should I spend time working to find my ancestors if there is no way for me to know if they are my blood relatives? Who knows who’s REALLY my kinfolk? There’s just no telling!” I put my family tree aside—again.
Sometime after having this conversation with my mother about this “rumor”, a man called her. My mom’s “dad” had recently passed, and Clarence Dudley was calling to inform her that HE was her real father. She asked, “Who is this playing such a cruel joke on me? My daddy just died!” Clarence responded that he knew that and had waited until Evan’s death to call her with this “news”. He said, “This is Santa Claus.” Right away, Mom knew who it was because a man named “Santa Claus” used to sometimes visit her mother when the kids (seven of them) were small. As shocking as this news was in the beginning, over time Mom and Clarence developed a relationship. He even attended my sister’s wedding—the one and only time we kids actually met our “grandfather”.
By the mid-2000s, I began working on the family tree again. By now DNA was the “thing”, so I sent mine in. Low and behold, a whole list of Dudley “cousins” showed up on my DNA Matches list! And not surprisingly, the McWilliams’ were absent. I also talked my mother into submitting her DNA. More Dudleys! I was excited! I was going to be able to research my actual blood relatives! It turned out my grandfather, Clarence was no longer living, but I have been fortunate enough to locate and befriend many, many Dudley and other, DNA cousins, including Clarence’s nieces.
I remember the first time I called one of Clarence’s nieces, Jeanne. I told her who I was, and that Clarence Dudley was my grandfather. She responded, “Oh, no! Uncle Clarence did not have any children.“ I responded, “Well, it turns out, he did.”
I explained to Jeanne that we shared DNA on Ancestry.com and I noticed that she had begun a Dudley family tree. I asked if she could help me learn more about the Dudley family. She seemed very excited to meet me and happy to share.
Clarence L. Dudley (1906-1987) and Margaret McWilliams Sallee (1929-2016)
Jeanne was in her late 80s and had story after story to share with me about the Dudley family. That was the beginning of my serious genealogical pursuits. Currently, I have 1800+ members on my family tree and look forward to many more years of both genealogical and paper research.